25 years without you.A lifetime with you in me. Somehow, both are true at the same time. There are days when 25 years feels impossible—like I’ve lived more of my life without youthan I ever got to with you. A whole childhood.A whole becoming.Versions of me you never got to meet. And I think about… Continue reading 25
Tag: grief
Seeing Past the Grief
Grief is loud in the beginning. It does not enter quietly or politely. It rearranges your entire life without asking for permission, and it refuses to leave when you beg it to. When you lose your mother at a young age, grief does not feel like something you experience. It feels like something that raises… Continue reading Seeing Past the Grief
You Are the Creator of Your Own Reality
This isn’t about pretending life is easy or convincing yourself that everything happens for a reason, because some things happened without your consent and changed you in ways no positive thinking could ever undo. It’s about recognizing that even when you didn’t get the guidance, the protection, or the softness you deserved, you are still… Continue reading You Are the Creator of Your Own Reality
My Disadvantages Are My Advantage
For a long time, I believed I started life behind. I believed that losing my mother early meant I was missing something essential. I believed that having to learn womanhood, emotional regulation, and identity without guidance was a disadvantage I would always be trying to compensate for. Now I understand that what felt like absence… Continue reading My Disadvantages Are My Advantage
Seeing the Gift in the Curse
Life doesn’t happen to you. It happens through you, around you, and sometimes against you. And how it lands, how it shapes you, how you move forward, depends entirely on the lens you carry inside your own head. ⸻ Turning Grief Into Guidance I lost my mother when I was too young to understand absence.… Continue reading Seeing the Gift in the Curse
I Wish Heaven Had Visiting Hours
I wish heaven had visiting hours, so I could sit with you again, hear your voice, soft and steady, feel the comfort of your presence like I used to. I would sit across from you, watch you smile, watch your eyes light up at nothing at all, and remember how the world made sense when… Continue reading I Wish Heaven Had Visiting Hours
Finally Realizing: I Have Nothing to Prove to Anyone
“I am enough simply by being me.” It hits differently when you truly realize it: you don’t owe anyone validation. You don’t need to explain yourself. You don’t need to fit into the boxes, expectations, or judgments that others try to place on you. I’m living for me and me only. Not for applause. Not… Continue reading Finally Realizing: I Have Nothing to Prove to Anyone
Do Not Put Shame Where God Has Put Glory
For a long time, I carried my mother’s absence like a quiet ache. It wasn’t the kind of grief that people asked about anymore, it was the kind that lingered after everyone else had moved on. The kind that became part of my reflection. As a girl, I didn’t have the words for it. I… Continue reading Do Not Put Shame Where God Has Put Glory
Part Three: The Mirror of What Could Be
There are moments in healing when the past still calls your name. Not to pull you backward, but to ask if you remember. To ask if you still wonder who you might have been if things had gone differently. I’ve found myself standing in that space often, between what was and what could have been.… Continue reading Part Three: The Mirror of What Could Be
What Was or What Could Be
There’s a quiet ache that comes from standing between two worlds, the one that was and the one that could have been. I’ve lived most of my life in that in-between, tracing the outlines of a story that never fully wrote itself, and rewriting it from memory and imagination both. When you lose your mother… Continue reading What Was or What Could Be