I never mentioned it. I always said I was fine, That I had a mom and a dad. I never said my mom died. That cancer took her. I never said I cared for her the best a child could. That I helped her in every way I knew how. I never said it was… Continue reading I Never Mentioned
Tag: mother
Living in a dream state
Living in a dream state ever since, walking through the hush of half-lit rooms, where shadows bloom and voices blur, and yesterday feels closer than today. And if we’re really being honest, I didn’t even understand the magnitude of the loss then— how could I? The world cracked quietly, like a hairline fracture in glass,… Continue reading Living in a dream state
The Dead Mom Club
Realizing I’m part of a club I never wanted to be a member of There are certain clubs in life you never imagine yourself joining. You hear about them, you maybe even know someone who’s a member, but you always think, Not me. Not yet. The Dead Mom Club is one of those. There’s no… Continue reading The Dead Mom Club
I was once someone’s baby
I was once someone’s baby. Cradled in hopes and stitched into dreams, Their pride and joy, their golden light, The soft promise of better things. I was their future shining, sweet. A wish whispered into the night. The medal on a shelf of memories, The reason they chose to fight. But time, it slipped, as… Continue reading I was once someone’s baby
When I had no one to talk to
I didn’t have anyone to talk to about losing my mom. No one who really got it, what it does to you when the one person who was supposed to guide you through life is suddenly just… gone. I was young, confused, and heartbroken, but the world kept moving. And I kept quiet. Grief is… Continue reading When I had no one to talk to
Standing on the Shoulders of Giants
Everything I imagine, everything I create, isn’t just mine.It comes from the women who came before me. Those who looked like me, felt like me, and dreamed even when the world didn’t make space for their dreams.Their hopes live in me. Creativity runs through my blood.Both of my parents were artists in their own way.A… Continue reading Standing on the Shoulders of Giants
Unwritten by Her, Authored by Me
Losing my mother gave me something I didn’t recognize at first—freedom.It came wrapped in grief, confusion, and years of aching silence. But hidden beneath all of that was an unexpected truth: I now had the space to imagine a life entirely of my own making. There were no expectations to live up to, no map… Continue reading Unwritten by Her, Authored by Me
A Lifetime Without My Best Friend
Sometimes I wonder if losing my mother is the reason I hesitate when it comes to forming close bonds with other women.I’ve gone most of my life without her, my first best friend, my first example of womanhood, my first safe place.And in her absence, I’ve found myself guarded, unsure of how to lean into… Continue reading A Lifetime Without My Best Friend
Just Not Home
I can go anywhere I want,Feel the sun on foreign streets,Let the wind call out my name,Chase the dreams my heart repeats. I can cross the open waters,Climb the hills, roam far and wide,Find new places, build new spaces,But not the one where she resides. Home is just a hollow echo,A ghost of laughter left… Continue reading Just Not Home
The Fire She Left in Me
I’ve been fighting my whole life,Waging wars I never chose,Reaching for a place to rest,A love that never fully rose. Knocking till my knuckles bled,Begging just to be enough,Longing to be held with ease,Not to fight to earn their love. If only she had more time,If fate had given just one more day,Maybe I'd have… Continue reading The Fire She Left in Me