For a long time, I believed I wasn’t capable of love — or worthy of being loved.
Losing my mom at such a young age deeply distorted my understanding of love. Without her to guide me, I never learned what it looked like to give or receive love in a healthy way. So I completely shut out the idea of love.
In my eyes, love was something only a mother could give. And when I lost her, I thought I lost my only chance at love too.
That belief stayed with me for years.
Until I got a dog.
Getting a dog turned out to be one of the most healing experiences of my life.
She taught me something no one else ever had: that love doesn’t have to come from you in order for you to feel it.
Growing up, I was taught that love was conditional.
If you do things right, then you’re worthy of love.
If you mess up, you get ignored. Misunderstood? Dismissed.
Love was something I had to earn — and if I didn’t measure up, it was withheld.
But my dog didn’t ask for perfection. She just needed my presence.
And in return, she gave me something I didn’t even know I was missing.
When I started showing her love, care, and attention, I watched her bloom. She grew into this beautiful, confident, self-assured soul. The way she walks, the way she interacts with the world — it’s clear she knows she’s safe. She knows she’s loved.
And in that, she started teaching me something powerful:
That I, too, can grow when nurtured.
That I, too, can bloom with the right kind of love.
That I can mother myself in the ways I should’ve been mothered.
She’s shown me that I am capable of love.
That I can receive it.
That it’s okay if it comes from an unexpected source.
Having her in my life has helped me understand that love doesn’t have to look traditional to be real. We’re often told that love is supposed to come from family, or maybe one or two close friends.
But I’ve come to believe this:
Love is something we build.
It’s something we nurture.
It’s in the quiet work of showing up — again and again — with care and intention.
And sometimes, love walks into your life on four paws and a wagging tail, reminding you that you were always worthy of it.
